about being afraid of walking alone at night, what i find hot, and my mental strength.

IMG_0262

what does the last text you sent say? and to whom?
“It was super cute!! First post here: http://vickys.se/ 🙂” about toronto, to my relatively new friend gbenga!

what does the last text you received say? and from whom?
“Thanks!” from my also new friend rei, who was one of the flight attendants i befriended when i flew from new york to los angeles last time.

what time do you wake up most mornings?
7 am if i’m going to the gym, 8 otherwise.

are you afraid of walking alone at night?
not as afraid as i should (???) be??

what do you do to relax at the end of a stressful day?
sit in bed with my blog (like right now).

dumbo.

do you enjoy your job?
so i’m interning at an ad agency here in new york as you might know. and i LOVE IT.

have you ever been offered drugs but declined?
yep.

have you ever met someone who has completely altered your way of thinking?
probably several of my close friends. one of the two jens-es i know has a very unique way to approach nutrition and innovation, and has taught me a lot of interesting things about those fields.

tell us something that turns you on.
guys who take initiative.

what is something you have given a lot of thought to lately?
the future. where i’m gonna end up, how it’s all gonna work out. IF it’s gonna work out (but hopefully somehow, it will).

saturday with siri.

when did you last swallow your beliefs to avoid an argument or confrontation?
probably like … today. it would’ve created trouble to say something out loud, but inside my head, i totally disagreed with the way someone was generalizing people. (but don’t worry peeps, i usually speak up—there is just a time and place not to, as well.)

do you usually initiate hugs?
if it’s people i know, yes! if i just know someone slightly, i’m always stressed out to make other people uncomfortable and wait until they initiate the hug. but i’m always happy to hug people! so take note!

are you a very affectionate person?
VERY. once i’m comfortable with someone. but before that point, i might come off as either 1) much cooler than i am, 2) awkward, 3) weird, 4) anxious? i don’t really know tbh.

what are you looking forward to?
just knowing about my next step in life.

do you have any tattoos. do you want any/more?
you know i do! i might get some more, yeah. but not yet.

one photo every hour. august.

are you mentally strong?
i literally have no idea what to answer here. in some aspects, i’d say i’m stronger than most, and in some aspects weaker than most. (lol.) so, to be more detailed, i’ve lived through lots of trauma growing up that had made me strong, but i also stress out REALLY easily in everyday life and get anxious about small things.

are you physically strong?
not extremely, but i think i’m stronger than i look, yes! i work out a lot, but i’m also a little, like, chubby, so you can’t really see my muscles, hehe.

do you think you’re a good person?
i want to be! i hope i am. that’s all i want to be.

name one thing you wish you could change about your life right now.
having a green card would be nice???

what do you usually eat for breakfast?
protein shake usually in the morning, and then coffee and a little snack (like a babybel or cashews) when i get to work. hehe.

sunday.

 

mao

den ärliga listan om vad jag tänder på, min mentala styrka och om jag är rädd att gå ensam på natten. och sånt.

first day in toronto: 13.000 shoes and pizza.

toronto / thursday.

so! let’s look at thursday in toronto. i landed early in the morning after the short flight over from new york (like 1,5 h).

toronto / thursday.

after getting a big breakfast at a little diner, i walked to drop off my bags. hello drizzly dowtown.

toronto / thursday.

my first mission was the shoe museum!

toronto / thursday.

apparently, they have about 13.000 artifacts. the first exhibition started way back several thousands of years. these particular ones are maybe not THAT old, but you know, still.

toronto / thursday.

and some more contemporary ones, like these (actual) moonboots.

toronto / thursday.

one exhibition was on men in heels, where these extravagant platforms that elton john had worn stood!

toronto / thursday.

hello from canada!

toronto / thursday.

another cool exhibition was on outerwear in the areas around the polar circle. a parka made from seal intestines or boots from fish skin, anyone?

toronto / thursday.

this last exhibition was on painful or hurtful fashion (like dresses filled with asbestus, corsets, extremely narrow shoes, and stuff like that). ouch.

toronto / thursday.

thank you, shoe museum! time to move on.

toronto / thursday.

look at this little baby! it’s so funny how different squirrels look in different areas. that there are black ones in canada, the huge fat grey new york ones, or the tiny ginger ones in sweden.

toronto / thursday.

and here i was thinking toronto would be just clean high-rises. oh how wrong i was.

toronto / thursday.

it was still gray and a little rainy in the afternoon, but it was ok cause toronto was still cute!

toronto / thursday.

with drizzle, low brick houses and graffiti, it felt more like london than north america?? totally different from what i expected!!

toronto / thursday.

i had heard a lot of good about the little area kensington market, so that’s where i went.

toronto / thursday.

the first place i was met by was the toronto popcorn company! a tiny store with like a million popcorn flavors.

toronto / thursday.

and then i browsed food and vintage clothing for a while (bought some stuff i’ll show you later) before returning to my temporary bed to chill for a bit.

toronto / thursday.

in the evening, i decided to take a walk towards financial.

toronto / thursday.

and passed by the windows at saks fifth avenue! so prettyyyyyyyy

toronto / thursday.

candy everything!

toronto / thursday.

hello city hall!

toronto / thursday.

and after a whole day of walking, i decided to reward myself with pizza. i went to this hidden place. libretto!

toronto / thursday.

and ordered this beauty! with (brace yourselves): roasted cremini mushrooms, gorgonzola, crème fraîche, asiago, pecorino, roasted garlic, brown butter, thyme, and lemon. plus a glass of cab. YUMMMMMMMM. slept so good after this. thanks for this first day, t!

 

mao

första dagen i toronto! gick på skomuseum, vandrade runt i gulliga kensington market och käkade en fantastisk pizza. så gullig stad! hade liksom förväntat mig sterila höghus bara, men det var mer litet och gulligt, men ändå lite rufft, som london typ. mys! 

eight just really really cute dogs.

hello post-thanksgiving monday. maybe this day is a slow one for you, if you have been out traveling like me, or in general (cause being tired is kind of  like what mondays are for, i guess).
so, no long serious post here today—let’s just look at some of my favorite types of dogs!! because why not. there’s never a wrong occasion for pups.

shar pei.

a

shar peis are sooooo funny, cause they kind of look like sea cows? and i find that kind of funny. in general, i like “ugly-cute” dogs rather than *beautiful* dogs (like labradors) or *cute-cute* dogs (like shih tzus). love this squishy sea cow face however.

bassett.

b

because EARS! and PAWS!! i sometimes can’t even believe that a dog with ears like this even EXISTS. but they do and that makes me so so happy.

french bulldog.

c

ok yes, this is like the #1 trend dog the last couple of years, but i guess it deserves to be mentioned anyways. i especially like this toasted color with lighter body and darker facial features. and HUGE ears please.

greyhound.

d

ok so greyhound definitely doesn’t fit in to my typical type of favorite dog (usually fat and squishy), but for some reason i really like greyhounds! they seem so humble and brittle. and cute with their little whiskers and thin shaky bodies.

corgi.

e

ok, another pretty trendy dog here but HOW COULD YOU NOT LOVE A CORGI though. short little legs, long dachshund-kind of bodies, ginormous ears and always A HUGE SMILE. plus wiggly walk. i cannot even with this breed. *cries*

english bulldog.

f

hehe, the fatter and duller version of the frenchie, plus hanging ears instead of pointy. i love how they walk slowly with their chubby little bods, and are generally unimpressed with the world.

chow chow.

g

omg this bear dog :'(((( <3 chow chows are like small brown polar bears with CRAZY thick fur. i just met a 10 month-old in toronto and DIED. i can’t really understand how they can see through all that fur? :)))) and also, did you know their tongues are blue?? <3

shiba.

h

but the greatest dog of all time is the shiba, after all. hilarious, cute, and stubborn all at once. three of the best qualities, i mean who wouldn’t want to be perceived like that? i know i would. LOVE ALL OF U SHIBAS OUT THERE <33333

what are your favorite dogs? let me know and lighten up my monday a bit.

and p.s: don’t worry, i’m not getting one (not yet hehe). i know i’m not at the point in life to be able to care for a dog, and i’m also aware of the many things that have to be taken in account when getting a dog, as well as some of the problems the different breeds have. WORRY NOT.

 

mao

åtta av de gulligaste hundraserna jag vet! på en trött måndag liksom. vad är era favvosar??
bilderna kommer från [min pinterest].

first toronto moments.

happy sunday, cyber besties!
as you know, i’m in toronto over the thanksgiving weekend. it’s so cute here! i have a ton of pictures to go through, edit, and show you—but first, let’s go through the first canada moments through my phone:

1

i had a window seat on my suuuper early flight out from new york, and the sun was rising just as i woke up from my nap in the seat.

2

when i landed, though, it was drizzly and foggy, although it looked very pretty against cn tower.

3

contrasts downtown. nice, don’t you think? (and yes, i promise i went to toronto even though the only city name i caught literally was “new york” that i just left looOOooOol)

5

the first night, i passed by city hall where this pretty color-shifting statue stands. <3

6

kensington market is so cute! filled with cute shops.

7

and a loooot of vintage! spent SO much time here.

8

i also expected toronto to be kind of clean in a sterile and sleek way, but it’s filled with quirk and graffiti. likey like.

9

i also went to steam whistle brewery and went on a tour! it was pretty interesting, and i also love their retro-style bottle! too bad they don’t export though.

10

that’s the first report from the 6! more pics are coming, so brace yourselves. xx

 

mao

här kommer en första titt på toronto genom mobilen! det var duggigt när jag kom, men cn tower var så snyggt i dimman ändå. prommade runt downtown och spenderade massor av tid i gulliga kensington market som är fullt av vintage. hat gått på bryggeritour också och spanat på graffiti. så fint det är här! mer bilder kommer asap. puss och glad söndag. <3

sounds from inside a metal heart.

as you might already know, there is the creative initiative monthly makers in the swedish blogosphere. each month, anyone can contribute for the theme of that particular month. for november, the theme is metal and just like previous months (here’s september, for example), i interpreted it in a written way (i’m no DIY:er) and wrote a text.

since the original is in swedish, i will post that version first. the english text follows underneath.

i hope you enjoy it. (and more texts of mine can be found in the category texts. ♥)

tatuering1svartvit

metallhjärta sjung så som bara du kan när jag slår och du ekar ihåligt det bor en koskälla i min bröstkorg och jag hostar varje slag
allt jag sa allt jag blev, som aluminium och frostade fönster, mina lungor nu som borstat stål och du—
på andra sidan en spegelblank sjö, så långt borta att jag knappt kan se dig, en ljudvåg som färdas över vidden, studsar och den vill säga mig något men allt är bara som ickeord ett oljud som filtrerat genom en ventilationstrumma av aluminium, aldrig har något så hörbart varit ett så urholkat eko som ditt,
jag anstränger mig för att hålla nere hostan, jag håller för munnen men mitt koskällshjärta bankar och vill ut, något metalliskt i otakt mitt bakom diafragman det är där synkoperna bor

men det bor en sång här inne också, det bor en melodi i mitt metallhjärta, den är tyst men den finns
kanske om jag springer längs sjön, kanske om jag varvar jordklotet kan jag spela den för dig, kanske kan du lägga örat mot min bröstkorg, lyssna på det som lever och så ska jag skriva ditt namn med ståltråd, svetsa fast det inuti, bränna fast det på koskällan som bor längst in

DSC09174

metal heart sing like only you can when i hit and you echo like as if you’re hollow there is a cowbell living in my rib cage and i’m coughing every beat
everything i said everything i became, like aluminum and frosted windows, my lungs now like brushed steel and you—
on the other side of a glassy lake, so far away that i barely can see you, a sound wave transporting across the space, bouncing and it wants to tell me something but everything is just like non-sounds a noise like filtered through an aluminum vent, never has something so audible been such a hollowed echo like yours,
i make an effort to keep the cough down, i cover my mouth but my cowbell heart is beating and wants out, something metallic out of rhythm behind the diaphragm that’s where the syncopes live

but there is a song living in here as well, there is a melody living in my metal heart, it’s quiet but it exists
maybe if i run along the lake, maybe if i lap the earth can i play it for you, maybe you can put your ear against my chest, listen to what is alive and so i will write your name with steel wires, weld it inside, burn it to the cowbell that lives inside at the back

SONY DSC

a lil wish list.

happy turkey day, my friends. regardless of what we think about thanksgiving and its origin, let’s rejoice about having the day off (at least here in the u.s.). today, i’m flying to toronto for the long weekend! i’m excited, and i promise to update soon enough.

it’s also one month left to christmas. it’s not my favorite holiday really, and i’ll probably not really celebrate it due to lack of family ehe, but i made a little wish list regardless, for fun:

a

• a new warm bomber jacket. i sold this one in the picture because it was a little bit too big :(

• a backpack. i’ve always just worn purses and have quite a few, but i’m still missing a decently sized backpack in my life (the only backpack i own is this one).

• the le teint ultra tenue fluid foundation from chanel in color 30 (beige)! i never really wear foundation, but i tried this one from a tester in a magazine and randomly, it fit PERFECTLY. what are the odds?

b

• new workout clothes. i have a few workout outfits, but i’ve had them all for quite some time now. time for upgrade!

• a gel manicure! i’ve only gotten one once before, but i liked it! maybe black this time.

• a fulltime jobbbbbb so that i can finally have peace of mind and know for sure where i’ll be for the next, at least like, year. so hard to plan the future right now.

c

• hehe, what do you meme which is a meme-based card game much like cards against humanity. seems hilarious.

• a real massage. i imagine that would be nice in a cold winter like the one approaching.

• some nice books! like chimamanda ngozi adichie’s americanah, that i’ve been wanting to read for a while, for example.

what is on your wish list this year?

p.s. 1. my xmas wish list from last year can be found here.
p.s. 2. all pictures in this post (except my own) are all from my pinterest.

 

mao

hej från en som är thanksgivingledig och flyger till toronto idag! ska berätta mer om det snarast såklart, men tills vidare kommer här en liten önskelista, eftersom julen är prick en månad bort nu. på min finns en fin ryggsäck, en massage, böcker och en nya träningskläder, till exempel.
vad önskar ni er i år?

museum of sex and a tiny pussy…cat.

two days ago, i gave you some tips about some great museums in the world, one of them being the museum of sex that i just had visited. so let’s take a closer look at that day!

museum of sex.

i was meeting up with my museum companion for the day, robert, at union square. that subway station is right now filling up with love on post-its after the election.

museum of sex.

here he is, friendie. it’s so good to have robert (who also moved here from san francisco) here in nyc where i don’t know that many people.

museum of sex.

it was windy and cold, but the empire state stood strong and proud as always.

museum of sex.

first, we checked out a bookstore that had a nice chandelier and fairytale-y wallpaper.

museum of sex.

and then we entered the museum of sex! we were greeted by ziggy stadurst.

museum of sex.

there were several exhibitions, all very different from each other which was fun. this first one was about hardcore sex in photography and film and its rise like 200 years ago (mostly behind locked doors of course because taboo).

museum of sex.

then a super interactive exhibition designed like a camping ground with sensors and tactical elements.

museum of sex.

the one following that was about animal sex and animal genitalia. some disturbing pictures of closeups, as you might imagine.

museum of sex.

when we got down in the basement, we realized that there was a bouncy castle…

museum of sex.

made up from a sea of boobs!!!! we went in and jumped of course : D

museum of sex.

museum of sex.

wall-to-wall to the bouncy castle, there was an exhibition with sex-related objects and memorabilia (like this rube goldberg-kind of bike with a moving dildo in the front, hugh hefner’s smoking jacket, a playboy magazine in braille, and lots of other stuff). very interesting : )

museum of sex.

the last one was dedicated to new york’s sex scene in the disco age, and the room had been adapted accordingly. they even had a bar where you could order actual cocktails.

museum of sex.

LOVED all the photos in this disco exhibition. do any of you watch ANTM? if so, maybe you recognize the person to the right as one of the judges? (miss j!!)

such a fun museum, with so many different aspects of sex! thumbs up.

museum of sex.

after that, we went out in the cold again. saw one of the million new york squirrels sitting on a bench like a human. with its little hands tucked in!!! so cute right

museum of sex.

we went to robert’s place in williamsburg for a bit to eat muffins and drink coffee.

museum of sex.

but first and foremost for me to say hi to this little bleep!! a new roommate of his : ) CUTE SQUEEKY

mao

i helgen var jag och robert på museum of sex här på manhattan. det var ett spännande museum med flera utställningar som alla hade helt olika approacher på sex. mkt intressant!! tips tips. sen gick vi till honom, fikade och klappade på hans nya roomie, vita kattungen trixie!! gullig va <3

cute new york insta moments.

i haven’t done one of these posts in a while, so i thought we’d do one today and take a look at some cute moments from my insta feed lately since i moved to new york!

1

the afterglow of the sunset + a little bright moon at waterside wall street seen from south street seaport. that building to the right is where i work btw!

shooting in lowlight is so much funner with an iPhone 7 ???? also funner is a perfectly ok word. goodnight from shining-quietly-in-the-night new york city and a tired me. yea. no for real i should sleep goodnight

this one is from when me and jens took a late night stroll on the west side along the water and into tribeca. can you believe this is from my phone? iphone 7 is so great is lowlight!! gah

3

after leaving san francisco and my #1 mvp siri, i flew to los angeles for 31h for the swedish festival stockholm, ca and got to reunite with her for 24 hours <3

so, i made friends with the flight crew from new york to los angeles on friday night. tonight, i met up with them again + their other entourage (12 people in total) down on the ground here in manhattan and went for dinner. sometimes life, traveling alone, and an open mind can lead you to great things (like amazing pasta) ???

also, on my plane ride there, i made friends with two guys from the flight crew. i met up with them (+10 more of their crew colleagues!) when they were in new york about a week later and had dinner. awesome right??? (why traveling alone rocks.)

here i am looking serious af but am actually really excited over being at opening ceremony because every single thing in there is so darn pretty

selfie at opening ceremony, where everything is so darn PRETTY

freckly six month-old office angel

one of our many office dogs. this might be my favorite though—arnold. a six month-old freckly little teddybear.

and despite all, there is a sun that will rise tomorrow.

the day following the election was the only gray and rainy day here in new york city. very appropriate. at dusk, the new york stock exchange was lit up like this and it was sad and terrible everything but also beautiful, and everything all at once.

8

magic view from our office.

woke up to a sunny new york saturday and found myself in a lower east side kitchen where a stranger handed me a dreamy brunch instantly when i stepped in the door????? what is life

this past saturday, one of my oldest friends from grade school who i went to the same class with growing up in sweden (who also lives here in nyc) said that i should join him for brunch at his friend’s place. i had never met her, but immediately when i stepped in the door, she handed me a dreamy sandwich? eh PEOPLE tbh <3 and then we ate what felt like 30 pounds of cheese and got a lil day drunk. saturdays though.

HAPPY FRIDAY ?? here's a pic of me so you don't forget how i look and a pic of me smiling so that i don't forget how to smile (because that's apparently important in this patriarchy LOLOL JK (or not really joking but w/e) have a great weekend guys)

and finally, here’s a selfie slash outfit pic for friday’s thanksgiving party with work!

double-tap these and 1315 more of my insta gems at @vickys.se. and have a lovely  tuesday! <3

mao

tio glimtar från min instagram på senaste! typ som när jag käkade pasta med ett flygcrew jag lärde känna på planet till LA sist, en gullig valp på mitt jobb, den fantastiska utsikten från vårt kontor eller brunchmackan min barndomskompis gustavs kompis räckte mig sekunden jag steg in i hennes lägenhet i lördags. typ sånt. detta och mer på @vickys.se på insta som vanligt såklart. puss och gla tisdag!

favorite museums around the world.

november might not be the most popular month, but you can’t deny that it’s a great one for going to museums, right? i thought i’d gather a few museums around the world that i really like. since they’re spread out around the globe, maybe this post isn’t immediately relevant for everyone—but save this post for when you’re traveling to some of these places!

new york.

⇒ 9/11 memorial museum. 180 greenwhich st. new york.

this was the most intense museum experience i’ve had. it looks tiny from the outside, but takes hours—so plan on having both time and mental energy. it’s placed underneath where the twin towers used to stand and is filled with pictures, history, debris from that day and other memorabilia. i. cried. so. much.

cal academy

california academy of sciences. 55 music concourse dr. san francisco.

cal academy is a little bit like a museum, and a lot like a rain forest and aquarium. thursday nights are *adult* nights and they serve drinks while you can stroll and get lost at staring at the magic jellyfish for ages.

palais lascaris

palais lascaris. 15 rue droite. nice.

palais lascaris is very interesting. it’s hidden in a small alley in nice’s old town, and once you go in there, you are immediately transported back in time. it’s a 17th century artistocrat building and musical instrument museum. it’s like you’re walking around in someone’s private castle (which you kind of are).

fotografiska.

fotografiska. stadsgårdshamnen 22. stockholm.

fotografiska is a pretty new museum for contemporary photography in stockholm. i’ve been there a few times and it’s always been super well curated, and sometimes they have cute unplugged live shows upstairs in the café.

museum of broken relationships.

museum of broken relationships. 6751 hollywood blvd. los angeles.

just like the 9/11 museum, be sure to have some mental energy when going in here, because it’s basically a collection of broken hearts. it’s a crowd-sourced museum where people have sent in memorabilia together with a story about their object. so heartbreaking. but also beautiful.

olivier visiting / friday.

sf moma. 151 3rd st. san francisco.

san francisco’s museum of modern art finally opened in may this year after being remodeled for about three years. i didn’t live in sf before the remodeling, but the new version of the museum is just SPLENDID. if you’re into modern art like me, it’s probably one of the top modern art museums in the world. BUT there are seven floors—so plan on spending many hours here.

img_3445

⇒ museum of sex. 233 5th ave. new york.

when i write this, i’ve just come home from visiting the museum of sex (separate post is on its way!). a pretty big and extensive museum with several different exhibitions tapping into various aspects of sex (today when i went, hardcore sex, animal genitalia, and the sex in the 70s were some of the exhibitons). fun and interesting!

vizcaya.

villa vizcaya. 3251 s miami ave. miami.

vizcaya is a renaissance-inspired villa right by the water in miami. it was a private property before, but is now a museum with beautiful italian renaissance gardens. it’s so sunny and quiet here, and i totally imagined this being the villa of the great gatsby. feels exactly like that.

1058252_10152622328186093_1108128284_n

astrup fearnley museum of modern art. strandpromenaden 2. oslo.

what immediately strikes you with astrup fearnley is the fantastic architecture inspired by a ship. when i was there, i found some parts more better than others. sometimes i found the areas weren’t used in the best possible way maybe, but however the damien hirst exhibition (i think it’s a permanent one) is FANTASTIC.

last day in san francisco.

antique vibrator museum. 1620 polk st. san francisco.

this mini museum is hidden in the back of the sex shop good vibrations, so it might be hard to find if you don’t know about it. so interesting about a phenomenon that has existed for so long (but not that evident in mainstream media because it was taboo for so long). very small but interesting.

do you have any tips on fantastic museums i have to visit? share please!

 

mao

tio museer runtom i världen jag tycker är värda ett besök. kanske svårt att bara kryssa av rakt av eftersom de är så utspridda, men spara inlägget tills du ska resa till nån av dessa ställen vettja! och tipsa gärna om museer jag borde besöka. puss

beautiful things in life right now.

room & roomies.

so. this was the actual post i wanted to write the other day when i flipped the table and decided to be upset for a little while. it’s ok to be upset, but i feel better now, so here’s a few nice things in life right now:

♥ work. i’m having such a great time. even though i was sad about leaving cali, i landed in an amazing environment with the best possible people.

♥ gifs.

♥ how literally everyone in the new york plays candy crush in the subway. all ages, genders, classes. very sweet.

♥ how the weather has been so nice here. weather has a big impact on me, so i’m super thankful for that.

♥ not having as much anxiety. looking back on this year, i can see how the spring was AMAZING and i was just so so happy all the time. in the summer i spiraled down into a fucking HOLE and felt like shit being anxious all the time. and now i feel pretty stable in-between. yay!

♥ dancing to silly hits until morning.

♥ getting to know new people.

♥ changing my workout routine. i always used to work out in the evenings but my work schedule has had me change that so that i had to start working out at 7.30 a.m. instead. i got used to it pretty quickly, and i feel like it’s a good change to my body and mind.

♥ starting to love new york. i mean, i knew it would happen eventually, but i had to let my heart me homesick for san francisco for a while. it’s been getting better now.

the butterfly house.

mao

sist jag tänkte skriva detta inlägg blev det ett argt och ledset istället, men idag känns finare så här kommer det! fina grejer just nu helt enkelt, som till exempel att se äldre människor spela candy crush på tunnelbanan, att jag ändrat min träningsrutin och tränar på morgonen istället vilket känns bra, att jobbet äger och att jag börjat gilla (på riktigt) new york nu. det tog ett tag av att vara hemlängtig till san francisco, men det är bättre nu. <3